Chronicles of a single Christian woman: Part two

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Have you ever said to yourself, “Eve… you had one job.” Or even blame Adam for not stopping his wife from eating that fruit. If they followed the rules, then we could all just walk around without feeling all these feelings we have. Personally, I can’t stand emotions. Most of the time they just hurt and all people want to do is talk about them. I just want to get over it and move on with my life, who has time to harp on feelings… Anyways.

This whole being single thing is pretty hard as I stated in my last blog “Chronicles of a single Christian woman.” I prayed for the Lord to give me an idea for the second part and the only thing I got was Adam & Eve. I’m assuming the Lord left it up to me to make that creative. After pondering on that for awhile, I realized that God gave Adam his perfect mate. So, if he did that for Adam, then there is hope for the rest of us right?!

I try to imagine what Adam & Eve felt the first time they saw each other. Was it love at first sight? Did they talk about their likes and dislikes? What did they do for fun? Did Adam say, “I like to take long walks through paradise?” Considering they hadn’t messed it up for the rest of us yet, it must have been love at first sight and I assume dislikes wasn’t a thing yet. I mean they were naked and felt no shame so there’s that. I’m not sure of anyone who can be naked and not be flooded with the thoughts of everything they find wrong. Man, if we could only go back and fix that mistake. Sorry, got off track there..

Then I wonder what life was like for them after they sinned. Now they have all these feelings and going from being perfect in paradise to feeling shameful, how did they get along after that? Did they argue? Did Adam start getting on Eve’s nerves? These are the kind of questions that go through my brain when I have nothing to do. When I get to heaven, I have a lot of questions I’m going to need answers to. According to the Bible, Adam & Eve lived a very long life together and had really big family. So obviously they made it through the tough times together and to me, they are a true inspiration of what a relationship can be. Yes, I know… they lived a VERY long time ago, but they were still human. Imagine having to spend almost a thousand years together, that gives a whole new meaning of spending a lifetime together.

For all of us single ladies, regardless if you follow the Lord or not, we feel hopeless sometimes. When you spend most of your life in relationships and then have to learn to be alone, it’s a tough transition. When I didn’t have Jesus in my life, I would get overcome with fear of being alone and that led to horrible mistakes. Even to this day those thoughts of who is going to want a used, abused, washed up woman with lots of emotional damage over whelm my mind. When I tell you I’ve been put through the ringer.. but I didn’t know any better. I just wanted a family. I wanted it so bad that I kept putting myself through all the heart ache because I knew one day something good would come along. All I was doing was blocking the blessings because I kept putting my flesh first. If I knew then what I know now.. I know my life would have ended up different. But here’s the thing.. We don’t get a do over. We learn and move on!

When the Lord came into my life, I found myself born again. That is when my life took a turn for the worse and became harder. Not only was it hard but it became darker. People think it’s easy to follow Jesus but I’m here to tell you that it’s not. It was easier to not care about anything…

I was Eve standing at the tree when that tricky serpent came along. He made life look more appealing with all the false promises. So I married him… then two years later, I realized that I was being abused. How do you not know you’re being abused? Because it was normal part of life for me, it was all I knew for ten years. I got out and after what seemed a long time of being on my own, I got scared. It was time to start the process all over again. When you get married and divorced twice within a four year time span, you feel a little embarrassed. Okay a lot embarrassed.. I think I felt more shame on this recent divorce than I did the last one.

I’ve decided that enough is enough.. Why am I fighting for something so hard that I don’t need to fight for? God has a plan and I’m just going to have to be okay with that plan. While I’m in my season of being single, I get to write about it and bring a little comfort to my sisters who feel like there is no hope. We don’t know what the future holds for us and I’m honestly to the point that I’m just going to go with the flow. Dating is hard.. It was hard before Jesus and it’s going to be even harder with Jesus. I’m not ready to go swimming in the dating pool yet, and I’m not sure when I will be.

At this point, I am really trying not to become a crazy cat lady. Scratch that, I am crazy and I am a cat lady, so I’m trying not to become a crazy cat lady with more than two cats. (LOL) It’s so much easier just having to worry about yourself. I can get up when I want to, I can eat what I want to, I can do whatever I want and I don’t have to worry about someone else and how they feel. My clothes can stay on the floor, the dishes can stay a little longer in the sink and my hair can stay in a messy bun on top of my head. Now you know some of my bad habits! Here’s another bad habit I have.. I randomly sing songs to my animals. They all have their own song and my singing voice is horrible. I also dance to any music that I hear, even if it’s a commercial. I have tons more but I will leave some of that a mystery!

To my single ladies, it’s going to be okay. Don’t settle for someone that gives you a little attention and then ignores you once they have you. Don’t settle for someone that has a good paint job only to find out their warranty ran out years ago. Don’t settle for anyone that can’t put up with you and your twenty-five personalities! More important, don’t settle for anyone that won’t pray for you and that doesn’t love Jesus more than you.

I love your face!

Stay tuned..


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